Wayward sheep and frolicking lambs
by Elouise
Equanimity —
They say it’s
Calm composure
Regardless
Drowning in pain
Ecstatic with joy
Beginning a journey
Relaxing into dusk
Fighting for my life
Bearing life in me
I want to stand
before You
With calm composure
Because You alone
Are my advocate
The gracious Shepherd
Of wayward sheep
And frolicking lambs
Dear Shepherd of sheep and lambs,
Is it well with You today?
It’s easy for me to experience equanimity when the sun is shining. Right now it’s gorgeous. Bright, warm and inviting.
Yesterday was a drippy mess of clouds and chilly air. Music helped. So did writing. And making a big pot of soup. Yet in the end, even this can’t last forever.
I wonder what You did when things didn’t seem to go as planned? I already know You prayed a lot. What else did You do as You approached death?
You see, I don’t want to die. I don’t think You did, either. Even before the birth of COVID-19 (such a cold name for this vicious virus), I didn’t want to die.
Before You were so rudely arrested, were Your tears a sign of calm composure? I wonder if equanimity in the face of death is overrated. Not necessarily bad, but overrated. So many people are dying ‘early’ these days.
Please advise.
Elouise♥
© Elouise Renich Fraser, 1 April 2020
Photo found at edgarsmission.org.au
Telling the Truth 
When I visited Hospice patients especially younger ones but even elders, they lived life every week, everyday, every minute, every second. Some were surprised that they awoke the next day. Others were mad that they had not gone during the night. Some gave all their possessions away and then found that their departure was delayed long after their Christmas decorations were put away for one or even two years later. The most memorable was a woman who suddenly decided she wanted to volunteer and did so at a local nursing home for a year after discharge from the Inpatient Hospice unit. Many road the train journey together while new ones came aboard, others got off early or stayed on board after missing their original stop called by the great conductor. Sorry for the long response but was good to reminisce.
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I love your reminiscing, Dave. It shows how much we don’t know what we don’t know! 🙂 I can empathize with every one of them. Somehow the sheep get to the fold….one way or another. 🙂 I love it. Sounds like an adventure, if not always a great adventure. Thanks for sharing your memories. Especially now, when things are highly fluid and unpredictable.
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You are very welcome. I will be remembering other lambs for the next several days after reading your posts.
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As Dylan Thomas said, “Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”
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Yes! Thanks for this wonderful quote.
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