It’s late summer, 1951. We just moved from El Monte, California, to a house near Savannah, Georgia. The front yard faces the river you see in the photo above. I’m 7 ½ years old. I don’t know how to swim; a half-mile wide river flows in front of our house.
Not long after we move in, Read the rest of this entry »
~~~Islands of Palau in the South Pacific
In 1984, one year after I began teaching, I attended a gathering of faculty from 6 or 7 sister seminaries. We were together for one weekend. There weren’t many women professors in the group.
Because I was the newest female professor Read the rest of this entry »
Waves of grief on a gorgeous spring day. Unannounced, unexpected, healing and welcome.
#5
Grief
Washes my face
With tears of sorrow
It started about 9am this morning. My heart Read the rest of this entry »
It’s Wednesday morning, about 7:15am. I’ve just walked into the prep room where I’m shown to my bed. I see several other beds in this busy room, each with so-called privacy curtains.
#2
Curtains close around Act One
I’m alone with my heart and one large plastic bag
The beginning of Act Two
This morning small verses began popping into my mind. In fact, they haven’t stopped coming. So here’s #1 with brief comments about my hospital visit six days ago to get a pacemaker.
#1
Stripped to my
Lowest common denominators
I lie naked
My worst nightmare, especially at this age: Read the rest of this entry »
Do you want nothing but the best? If so, George MacDonald tells us exactly how to get it. My comments follow his sonnet. Read the rest of this entry »
On a happy outing with D and our children, somewhere on the West Coast, 1976
It’s now 1975-76. I’m in the last year of my master’s program at Fuller Seminary. D and I were happily married when we arrived at seminary. In fact, my happiest memories up to then are about my relationship with D. A little conflict is to be expected, right? Read the rest of this entry »
Secrets of my body
pause, linger, bleed slow
through veins
barely alive, gasping—
for Air.
The cost of keeping family and personal secrets Read the rest of this entry »
sky darkens
clouds thicken
squirrels panic
birds gorge
breath freezes
cold bites
wind gusts
grocery shelves empty
Storm warnings. Do you know the signs of what’s coming when the storm is called PTSD? I’m surrounded by people living with PTSD every day. Each of us is affected by PTSD even though we may not personally have this disorder.
I’ve never been in the military or hunted down and terrorized in open warfare. Yet I live with PTSD connected to early childhood and teenage trauma at home. It began erupting Read the rest of this entry »
eyes smile
reach out
connect
***
She was about 10 or 11 years old,
quiet and a bit hesitant.
Though we’d never met, we shared a past.
Not together, but separately.
I’d just told the story about my childhood
to a group of adults and children.
She cried during part of it,
leaned over and said something to her mother. Read the rest of this entry »
Telling the Truth 