Still Learning to Pray
by Elouise
Today is a quiet day. Not because I’m sick, but because I need to take care of myself. So I’m revisiting several books on prayer. Why? Because current events in the USA tug me this way and that way. Sometimes I feel as though I’m wandering, lost in the trees. Uncertain how to pray or how that might help my focus from one day to the next.
Here’s what I’m certain of today.
- The human confusion into which I was born multiples daily, and isn’t going away of its own accord. Ever. There are things I’d like to undo and re-do in this world and in myself. I want us to sort things out and be good neighbors. Yet I fear it isn’t going to happen, even though we’re all part of God’s good if not perfect creation, and need each other to survive.
- Human confusion seems to have a life of its own. It feeds on itself, creating ever-more-shocking statements, behaviors, attitudes and reactions. It thrives when we’re fearful and distracted. On guard. Looking over our shoulders as we try to figure out what just happened, and miss what’s already brewing for tomorrow.
- In my small world, confusion shows up in anguish about what I’m to do from one day to the next. I’m not utterly lost or clueless; yet I don’t feel grounded in a clear approach to what’s happening around me. I don’t have a clear goal for each day that calms my heart and helps shape my actions. I often feel uncertain and lost, especially when I start checking out tantalizing, infuriating headlines that pop up every minute of the day.
For the last few weeks I’ve been thinking about prayer. Granted, our pastor is preaching about it every Sunday, so it’s difficult not to think about it! At the same time, I wonder how I am to pray, given confusion around and within me.
I used to think once I learned to pray, I’d have it all figured out. As though it were like theology. I think about theology as dialogue with Scripture, traditional documents, other conversation partners, the newspaper and my experience as a woman. It works!
However, when I consider prayer, my major dialogue partners have been God or Scripture or what my parents or the church told me to do. The newspaper has been a secondary partner. And though I’m aware of myself as this woman (not just any woman), I haven’t figured out how that shapes my approach to prayer. Sometimes I fear there’s something wrong with me–even though I know there is not.
So I’ve decided to look into this and begin writing about it from time to time. I want to live boldly with the courage of my convictions, as this follower of Jesus Christ who is this woman living in these troubled times. Somehow, I believe my dilemma about prayer lies at the center of my anguish about who I am and how that shapes my prayers from day to day. Especially now.
© Elouise Renich Fraser, 25 February 2017
Photo found at parentingupstream.com
So well said, Elouise. Your last paragraph, especially resonates with me.
I, too, want to live in this way. Thank you for the encouragement, and the reminder to encourage you, too.
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You’re welcome and Thank you, Debbie. I greatly appreciate your encouragement. These are strange times. 💜
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Thank you for the spark Elouise. This weeks lection, being Transfiguration Sunday, includes the phrase “Listen to him!” which has been for me a invitation to re-examine my prayer life and willingness to listen instead of tell!
Also, Friday night I attended a concert Natalie was singing in, 16 singers, a cappella, and the oldest piece was composed in 1998. I took off my glasses and bowed my head and enjoyed the music in a way I rarely do. (Almost all the lyrics were in Latin). I can’t say I was listening for Jesus, but I did find God speaking to my soul without words.
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A huge YES to listening! And forgetting about getting all the words and meanings. kudos to Natalie and her musical partners! And to you for taking it all in without knowing the language. Our hearts and spirits are capable of all this and much more.
Elouise 😊
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A most thought provoking and excellent post Elouise, being still and absorbing the silence of self love and taking care of the mind and body is a most wonderful thing too ❤
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Yes it is. I was never encouraged to do this as a young girl. Too many tasks to be completed. ✅✅✅✅✅✅😕
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Older and wiser and free to choose💕💜☮🙏🏻
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😎🎵🌻😻❤🤡🤠🎵🦋💕
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oooh, love the pretty blue butterfly, will have to search for that one 🙂 have a lovely day my friend ❤
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The link is embedded in a WordPress site which I follow. The reasons why Emilio embedded the Youtube thing he talks about at great length, everything he does is a great length, I doubt any of his posts are less than 10 thousand words, this one is kind of short for EJ;
EJ was once a Catholic, I believe.
He is an atheist, and what he says in his post is good reading, Might I suggest when you have a moment, look at the youtube link then read what he says, I’d be interested in your thoughts on what he says.
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Thanks! I’ll do that. Have an unreasonably Good Day! Or maybe you already did? 😊
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Thank you Elouise, yes, yesterday was a tolerably good day XD..
You forgot; it’s tomorrow here 🐻 🙂
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so now it’s still tomorrow….not fair….no way to catch up! 🙂
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Well Elouise if you ever see one of those sandwich board clowns with the message “The world will end tomorrow” you can always tell them you’ll check see if I’m still around first.
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Brilliant idea! Thanks, Brian. Good laugh for the beginning of a good day. 🙂
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I’m back–finally! To respond to the links you sent me. I read them right away and have reread them today.
First, I love the video! We don’t even begin to appreciate how small we are in this universe. Which, I think, is a good thing. We aren’t the center of the universe. No problem.
Second, each person is entitled to his or her point of view when it comes to God and religion and the universe and all that. In fact, I appreciate it when people are clear about what they believe and why.
Third, it always feels strange to hear someone describing a ‘me’ that doesn’t exist. I didn’t recognize myself in your friend’s description of religious believers. He clearly has a settled point of view. I prefer one on one dialogue rather than attempts to put people into manageable slots or groups. Especially when they’re certain these other groups are wrong or somehow less than adequate. It seems that’s one of our largest challenges today–no matter what the future brings for any of us. We’re neighbors, whether we like it or not.
Thanks for the back and forth! 🙂
Elouise
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Praying find a happiness in heart.
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Thank you kindly. 🙏🏻
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