Children at Longwood | Photos
by Elouise
On Saturday afternoon D and I helped celebrate family birthdays–four of them, within the space of one week! Our son (his big 50), twin granddaughters (18 years old, seniors in high school), and daughter-in-law (I’m not telling). Only their young son gets his own special day later this fall (15 years old).
All this family stuff got me a bit nostalgic. Hence these Longwood Garden photos taken in late April 2006. As I recall, this was our granddaughters’ first visit to Longwood. These were also the golden years when I was Queen Elouise and carried a sun parasol to mark my exalted status.
Looking at these photos reminds me of the tough work our son and daughter-in-law did to honor their children’s gifts and personalities. It’s never easy.
Yesterday I heard this on the radio: Having children doesn’t make a man a father. The statement clicked with me instantly. To it, I would add this: Being a ‘father’ or ‘mother’ of the church (as in padre, nun, priest, bishop, archbishop, pastor, youth minister) doesn’t confer or guarantee the ability to relate honorably to children or young people.
In the news last week: the Pennsylvania report about child abuse at the hands of Roman Catholic priests and their superiors. All of it covered up by people and a system that took care of its own. Plus, a few days later, reports about the Pope’s visit to Ireland and the legacy with which that nation’s population lives–as do many others.
I only wish it were possible to track similar behavior in Protestant churches here and elsewhere.
All this and more brought back my relationship with my father. He was an ordained Protestant clergyman, sporadically under the loose oversight of a governing body. I have more work to do.
For today, I commend men and women who work hard at parenting and foster-parenting. Especially when they don’t have many models or cheer leaders when things get more than a bit crazy.
Elouise♥
©Elouise Renich Fraser, 27 August 2018
Photos taken by DAFraser at Longwood Gardens, April 2006
Elouise, how delightful to stumble across your blog!! I found it as I was searching for comments on one of Mary Oliver’s poems which i use for meditation each morning. Will seek to keep following. I still remember the wonder of discovering Augustine and Acquinas under your tutelage and I have kept my summary papers thru MANY moves.
Ken and I are in the process of moving to New Haven, CT where our son is part of the Andover Newton team connecting ANTS with YDS. We will have an apartment in the house he and his wife Michelle bought last year.
Our best to you and D!!
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Hi, Pat! I’m thrilled you stumbled across my blog! Wow. I just love Mary Oliver’s poems. They flow effortlessly, and are never predictable. Thanks for your kind comments about that class. Wow. I’m amazed that you still have your summary papers–though I totally get why you wouldn’t want to throw out something you labored over! 🙂 Your new home sounds fantastic, and I wish you and Ken all the best. A connection between ANTS and YDS would be spectacular, too. Seminaries have to get creative these days or else…. Feel free to come back anytime! This is the first time in my life I’ve been able to say exactly what I want to say. Sort of. 🙂
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I met with our men’s group last night and shared 1 Thessalonians 5:22 (avoid the appearance of impropriety or evil) with them. I spoke of the powerful ministry that men in the church I grew up in played for me as role models after my father died when I was 5. Later my stepfather (who was a Deacon in the same church) demonstrated the same kind of abusive behavior toward me that you experienced. It is a mixed bag isn’t it. Somehow the Lord enters in and touches our souls.
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Oh, Dan. The shadows of child abuse are long, aren’t they? I believe we can heal; I also believe we can never experience what was taken away from us–not in the way we would have experienced it as a child. Definitely a mixed bag. I’m going to do a post or two about how my approach is shifting at this time in my life.
Thanks for your comment and for what you’re doing with your men’s group. Telling our stories is always powerful–not just for others, but especially for us and our families.
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All the best to everyone!
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Thanks Herminia! It’s wonderful seeing our granddaughters at 18…just beginning their senior year of high school.
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I can only imagine. I remember that day well. Good luck to them.
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I just love the photograph of all the children in the tree. Climbing trees was something we all used to do. Now there are so many so called ‘experts’ telling young parents that it is dangerous. So much fun and adventure is being ‘banned’ by stupid experts.
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Today, alas, they have a chain around the perimeter and a sign forbidding anyone to climb the branches. 😟
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I wrote you a poem.
https://wp.me/p8PuzR-1oc
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I just read this and left a comment. Thank you, John. It’s a lovely poem about the harsh realities of life. Including not letting children climb on trees anymore lest they stub a toe or get a splinter or find out about their strength. The photo is gorgeous!
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