Telling the Truth

connecting the dots of my life

Tag: Bloggers

My voice is my Treasure

All my life I’ve lived under a shadow of silence. I don’t even know what to call it. It was my hiding place. A gigantic dark place. A cloud of thunder and lightning. Winds whipping trees in the night. Holding my breath until I thought I would burst. Watching my back lest I be caught unawares.

I began this blog because I wanted to find my voice. Not my professional voice, but my personal voice. It peeked out from time to time, but quickly retreated when challenged or under threat. I loved my voice, but I didn’t yet treasure it. Nor did I see it as a treasure.

I’ve been blogging for nearly three years. At first Read the rest of this entry »

About Awards and Me

End-of-Year Awards

The first time a blogger nominated me for an award, I didn’t know what to do. Was I happy? Yes! Thrown into inner turmoil? Yes! It felt like an interruption that would derail my writing.

I decided Read the rest of this entry »

Three Days, Three Quotes Challenge | Day 1

The more you talk, the more likely you are to sin,
If you are wise, you will keep quiet.
(Proverbs 10:19, New English Version)

The first time I read this proverb in the New English Version of the Bible I laughed out loud. Read the rest of this entry »

My Reclamation Project | Part 2 of 2

Jazz-music-seamless-pattern--Stock-Vector-jazz-pattern-guitar

Several things stand out in my dream:

  • It’s early morning; I’m walking uphill, not downhill. (encouraging signs)
  • Though I don’t describe it, I’m wearing shoes. I’m not barefoot. (encouraging sign)
  • I’m in a semi-official capacity without being the leader of the team. (I like this)
  • My father is doing something I never saw him do in his entire life. (It astonishes me)
  • Three themes stand out: reclamation, improvisation and music. (How are they connected?)
  • The sound of music is important in the dream. (Yay!)
  • At least one of my sisters appears in the dream. (I’m surprised)
  • My instruction to team members takes an unexpected theological turn. (I’m speechless)

Assumptions I’ve made:

  • All participants in this dream, including me, are reclamation projects.
  • The team will do for others what others did for them–reclaim persons put out with the trash.
  • I’m not part of the team, and I’m not in charge. Someone sent me to do a task, not to lead the team.
  • My task won’t take forever; it’s the last phase of orientation for new team members.

Two questions came to mind right after I woke up:

  • Is this about blogging? Lately I’ve had several dreams about blogging.
  • Why did I go all theological with the team there at the end?

Here’s how I’m thinking about the dream today.
I’m one of Jesus’ reclamation projects. I also have countless others to thank for helping pick me up from various trash heaps.

Some trash heaps were designed specifically for women. Sometimes I seem to have chosen a trash heap on my own. I say it that way because part of being reclaimed means understanding the dynamics of coercion, seduction and being set up for failure. Nonetheless, I’ve been reclaimed many times over.

In fact, it’s reassuring that this team is going to look for discards (people). I’m happy others are out there looking. Maybe they’ll find me again someday.

My father was a great improviser. Not of music, but of solutions to things that didn’t work properly (machines, not people). He kept a shed and back yard full of what some people would call ‘junk.’ The kinds of things Depression-era women and men valued for their as yet unknown future use.

So here I am, a reclaimed woman, musician and now a blogger who happens to be a theologian. What do I offer women and men who visit and read what I write? And where does my ‘junk’ come from?

I offer the mostly improvised music of my heart, mind and soul. I use memories, bits and pieces of knowledge I’ve collected, old photos, new photos, and other people’s writings that move me. I also use my experience, including what happened and happens to me on the inside. Things like secrets and less-than-beautiful behaviors.

I can’t do this alone. I need others who show me how they do it, or who ask me tough questions. I need to hear them play their music. It doesn’t matter whether it’s overtly theological or not. If it moves me, it rings true. It brings joy, tears, thoughtfulness, challenge, clarity of sight, grief and sadness, or the knowledge that I’m alive and not alone.

As a blogger, my reclamation project is about recovering parts of my life that got trashed along the way, internally and externally. It’s also about being alert for pieces of your lives that inspire me to write yet more unscripted posts that reclaim some of my personal ‘junk.’

Whether it comes from you or from me, it’s music. It doesn’t banish the pain of life, or focus only on what’s beautiful to divert attention from what’s real. Rather, it’s music that accompanies all of life, inviting both sadness and joy to be heard, heeded and shared.

My father’s unexpected improvisation on his guitar is a sign. It shows what can happen when other music, especially from strangers, inspires me to improvise songs I didn’t know I’d lost along the way.

© Elouise Renich Fraser, 26 August 2015
Image from 123RF.com

My Real Neat Blog

real-neat-blog-award1

Thanks to two of my esteemed followers, I’ve been nominated for a Real Neat Blog Award not once, but two times within the last 24 hours! How neat it that? Read the rest of this entry »

Toasting the Blame Documents

Leftovers.  Sometimes they’re wonderful.  Then there are the other times.  They just sit there in the refrigerator waiting for me to do something with them.  In reviewing my blog posts this past year, I couldn’t overlook unfinished business I still have with my father.

It isn’t as though I’ve been twiddling my thumbs. Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Readers | 1 Year Old Today!

P1040943

Dear Readers,
One year ago today, I held my breath and hit publish for the very first time.   Also one year ago, some of you started showing up for the very first time.  I’m beyond grateful for your faithful reading, comments, likes, encouragement, and presence. Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Readers, I love writing!

I also love hearing from you.  Is it time to get some of my posts published?  Perhaps as an e-book?  I’m considering it.  It would mean a change or two for me, including something I said I’d never do.

Confession: Read the rest of this entry »

Who am I as a Blogger?

I keep asking myself this question.  When I wrote my About Me page, I knew who I was.  But not yet as a blogger.

I’ll likely never meet most of you in real life.  Furthermore, you come in all styles and sizes.  An unmelted pot of humanity. Read the rest of this entry »

%d bloggers like this: